It never ceases to surprise me how much intolerance there is within the fetish community... While one individual may have their own likes, interests, and preferences, they seem to be completely oblivious or disrespectful of others. This is something which is completely counter-intuitive to me. Now, I grant you that this is a generalisation, and is not true of everyone, but the fact that it commonly occurrs, is, nonetheless, disturbing.

For example, there is a very many number of people in the world who are aroused by leather. Similarly, there are a number of people in the world who are aroused by latex. There are a smaller group of people who are aroused by both. But, there are many people who are aroused by leather who find the concept of latex to be unpleasant, and show no hesitation in expressing their dislike... So, my question is: WHY?

Fetishists, regardless of their individual interests, are a minority. Mainstream society considers many fetishes to be 'deviant sexual behaviour', and some religious organisations are less polite in their regard for us. It would seem to me that fetishists would be united under the cause of gaining acceptance and tolerance from mainstream society. Simply, by standing united as a community, despite our differences in sexual interests, we can present a face to mainstream society which requires introspective.

Legitimately, the most simple and vital thing we, as fetishists, can do is to be open and honest about who and what we are, and to be proud whenever our sexuality is brought into question... Because ultimately the decisions about our acceptance will be made by our neighbours, friends, family, and community. When confronted with the question of acceptance, the hinge for most people is whether or not they know someone who is into a particulat scene. (Jeff? Kind, patient, funny Jeff? Likes to get whipped and flogged by Rachel? Sweet, generous Rachel? Well, that's fine-- they seem like a nice couple who are in love!) Simply put, the single act of being proud of who and what we are over the years has been our strongest step towards being accepted in our communities and in our laws, (yes, I am looking at you, Texas...) By failing to give in to the concept that we should hide our lives from the public, and by not hiding the truth about ourselves from our friends, family, co-workers, and even the cashier at the corner store has created an understanding in others that has made our progress towards acceptance possible.

Yet, if we allow ourselves to be divided by the boundaries of our interests, and not be accepting of others because of their interests, this will never be possible. Now, I am not condoning the illegal fetishes here, such as paedophilia or necrophilia... I can understand why someone might be disinclined to accept that-- but, for the fetish community in general to have an open-minded attitude towards other people's interests. You don't have to understand their fetishes, or like them yourself, or particpate in them-- you simply have to accept the fact that they enjoy it, and support their right to practice their fetishes...

That's my two cents for this month...